parse-community/parse-server ? reverse-engineered prompt

Build me a self hosted backend platform for web and mobile apps that runs on Node and works with Express.

I want to be able to start it locally or in Docker, connect it to MongoDB or PostgreSQL, and then use it to store users and app data, upload files, send notifications, and expose both REST and GraphQL APIs. It should support standard things like sign up, login, permissions, querying objects, live updates, email verification, password reset, and custom server logic for special endpoints. Make it easy to plug into an existing app or run as its own service.

Please include clear setup steps, sensible defaults, health checking, and a simple example app or config so I can test it quickly. If you need to, look up the latest docs online and make sure the implementation matches current best practices.